Saturday, May 4, 2013

Dr. Christina of Sweden (1970)

Directed by Nick Philips
Starring Ushi Digard, Anna Travers
Rated X
USA

Dr. Christina is the "work" of infamous nihilist-punk grindhouse director Nick Philips, the sleazedealer behind loony fatsploitation slasher Criminally Insane, to say nothing of the self-explanatory Fraulein Leather, or the depressive psyche-horror Satan’s Black Wedding. Philips’ films are so grubby and heartless that they’re almost anti-fun, a black hole of sexless despair that suck the joy right out of your eyeballs. This one almost manages to claw its way out pf the black pit of Philipsylvania, mostly due to the inclusion of one Uschi Digard, the buxotic Swedish jawdropper known mostly for her turn as the pneumatic barnyard baller in Supervixen. I don’t know about you, but I’m willing to watch just about any piece of sewer trash if her magnificent udders and marble-mouthed accent are involved. Uschi shows up halfway through in a brief lesbian scene, making sweet, furry, freaky 70’s love with some chick on a ratty couch. And that’s the best part of the movie.

The rest involves a Swedish magazine columnist who writes under the name Dr. Christina wandering around Paris, jotting stuff in her notebook, taking a train, sightseeing, and every 20 minutes or so, stumbling into a spliced-in lesbian scene. I should note that there is no dialogue in this film, just the monotone narration of the good Doc gamely combating the squawking jazz score. Does that sound like fun to you? Fuckin’ Nick Philips, man. He’s done it to me again.

But hey, at least there’s a bonus featurette on the DVD called Sex Nurse that has some blowjobs!






- Ken McIntyre

Friday, May 3, 2013

Good Example of Embarrassing Mime

I'm sure I'm not alone in my uncomfortableness with mimes. They are weird and creepy. The main conflict any person educated in the arts has with mimes comes from the fact that it's a perfectly valid form of artistic expression. Part clowning, part performance art, part breakdancing and entirely related to the human experience, miming is indeed an undeniable art from.

It's just that is sucks balls as an art form.

As this embarrassing Howard Jones promotional video clearly demonstrates.


 


-Drew Buzzy

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails